Biology Experiments
by ACatWhoWrites
Summary: In which US is failing biology and wondering if UK could give birth. Gakuen Hetalia


Alfred grabbed his head with his hands in frustration. "_It just doesn't make sense!_"

"_What _doesn't make sense, Mr. Jones?" The blonde looked over his glasses to see the teacher at the front of the room with her fist on her hip and a frown on her face. "If you don't understand something, please say so, since you are failing this class." His classmates laughed. The blonde slid down in his seat, feeling his ears heat up. He loved attention but not when it made him look ridiculous.

Unconsciously, his internal thoughts had become external vocalization. Throughout the class period, he was making notes and diagrams, trying to figure out if male pregnancy was, in fact, possible. So far, though, it was turning out to be harder to muddle through than normal biology.

He could just ask the teacher, but that would mean admitting he wasn't paying attention during the lecture; then he would more likely than not end up serving a detention and doing rigorous biology work.

That's an idea. Alfred could ask Arthur to help him "study" biology...of the male anatomy. Maybe after a few experiments—totally for the sake of science—he'd have an answer.

The American looked back over his shoulder at Arthur. His face was down-turned, a look of concentration as he took notes on the teacher's lecture. Beside him, Francis had his chin in his hand, copying from Arthur's notebook. Feeling eyes on him, Arthur glanced up and met Alfred's eyes. Alfred grinned, sending smutty images via telepathy that—whether Arthur actually received them or not—made the English boy flush pink and return to his notes with renewed attention.

"Hey Arthur—"

"Go to class, Alfred."

"You didn't even hear what I was gonna say."

"And I don't want to. I have papers to write, so I'm off to the library." The Englishman pointed down the hall. "And your _class_ is that way." Alfred followed him down the hall, meandering like a friendly puppy. Arthur ignored him until they were outside the library. "What do you _want_, Alfred? You're already failing biology because you're slow or stupid or daydreaming, but you have gym class! Go...run a mile or something."

"I ran three this morning already," Arthur rolled his eyes and opened the library doors "but I have a question for you."

"The answer's no."

"You don't even know what—"

"If it's you, with your delusions of grandeur and heroism, it's most likely some nonsensical question that has no relevance to life; thus the answer is no." He set his books on a table, walking to the shelves and browsing for books for his essays. Teachers had a thing for making students use paper and internet sources, even though the internet was infinitely easier to browse through, says students.

"Stiff bastard." Alfred would not be stopped, though. The library was deserted save the low voices coming from the librarian's office, but if the kids were quiet, she didn't leave her telephone. He found Arthur a few rows back from the front of the library, silently paging through a hardcover book. He added it to his growing pile and looked up, squinting to read the spines. Alfred was about six feet tall, but Arthur was below average and stood on his toes to reach higher books.

So the American made his move.

"Alfred—!"

He handed his friend the book. "I'm just trying to help."

"Well _say_ something before doing that, or are you _trying_ to give me a heart attack?" Arthur took the book, pressing a hand to his chest. He could feel his pulse; his heart was beating wildly. The happened a lot when Alfred was close to him. "Jesus, someday you're going to kill me skulking around like that."

"Who's skulkin'?" Alfred protested with a shrug. "You knew I was here; you honestly thought I'd just forget I wanted to ask you a question and go to class?"

"I can only hope..." Alfred's arm blocked his way. Arthur glanced at him out of the corner of his eye, quickly turning around to go the other way but running into the American's other arm. Crouching to try going underneath, Alfred crouched with him, completely blocking his easy. Arthur sighed and sat on the carpeting. "Fine. What is it?"

"Can men get pregnant?" No beating around the bush. Alfred was on a mission for knowledge. If only it were relevant to his schooling.

"What the bloody hell are you talking about? Of course men can't; didn't you ever pay attention when learning about the male and female anatomy?"

"Refresh my memory." Arthur swallowed nervously at the American's husky voice.

"Well, uh, there're certain organs unique to each se—gender, and they're—"

"It's perfectly alright if you say 'sex' around me, Arthur; I'm not a little kid anymore."

Arthur turned bright pink. "I-I know that, you idiot!"

"So why didn't you?" Alfred kissed his jaw.

"Idiot!" The Englishman pushed against him with his book, but Alfred was bigger, stronger, and more determined, thus he could not be moved. "Don't you have anything better to do?"

"Consider this an experiment," Alfred said brightly, suddenly all smiles. "In a couple months, I'll know if you can get pregnant or not."

"M-Me?"


End file.
